I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
