I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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