Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
