so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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