carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Randomize