So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You need a sexual gate keeper
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
