He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Your cock deserves a montage
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize