I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
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