just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
