She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
