Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
