R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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