Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
