Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
