You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
