ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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