I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize