This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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