we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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