Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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