Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You dont lie about slip and slides
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
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