i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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