Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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