I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
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