Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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