God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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