So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
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