i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
My life is pants optional.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
