he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Randomize
