I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
