I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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