he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
