I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
