Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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