so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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