I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
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