My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
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