im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
