My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
