Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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