David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
