return my video game
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
