What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize