why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize