You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
