You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
