Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
