My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
