it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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