Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Randomize