No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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