I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
you never un-have a 4some
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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