and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
