Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..