Having a random hookup so left but love u
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
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All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
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She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.